Major changes. Again.

About a month ago Popeye came home from his two-week training with the military in Seattle. The next day he was called into the office and was fired. There was no warning. He had no write-ups, no disciplinary actions taken against him, nothin'. This stemmed from the hate of another deputy and instead of attempting to find out what was really going on, his employer just believed the lies and canned his most honest, hard-working deputy.
That day Popeye came home and I could visibly see the change on his face, in his walk, in the way he interacted with me and the kids. He was relieved. He was lighter. He was finally happy.
Happy until the lies continued and then the anger set in. It was easier, it seems, for Popeye to forgive and move on. He did it beautifully. Wrote a small email to the sheriff - never addressing the lies or pointing fingers of blame. Just gave a few words of advice and wished him luck and told him there were no hard feelings.
I, however, am struggling. I get one thought in my head about that man and it snowballs. The thoughts are a barrage of negativity that I can't seem to control. I want to approach him and tell him that he was wrong. I want to tell him that he has been deceived. I want to tell him how I've felt about him since the first time we talked almost 2 years ago. I want to tell him that the reason we continued to have WY plates on the van was not Popeye's doing, but mine. We were under the impression that Popeye was being deployed to Gitmo (remember that post a long time ago?) and that I was going to go back to WY while he was gone. We were anticipating getting a job with Laramie County in Cheyenne - why bother changing plates if we were going back? So I went to Cheyenne and re-registered the van. And bless my husband's heart, he won't let me take the blame. He just accepted the decision. I want to tell Sheriff Karl Dailey that he is an idiot. I want to tell him that a community that has been struggling with law enforcement for years was finally accepting us - was finally accepting Popeye. They like us. They love that Popeye does his job with patience, love & tolerance. They've made changes and they've come up to me and are so sad to see us leaving under these circumstances.
I want to tell that Sheriff that he is wrong. I want to tell him that he is a power-seeking, egotistical tyrant that had a personal vendetta with my husband and he abused that power. I want to tell him so many things. I want to use profanity. I want to yell and scream.
But I can't. It wouldn't change a thing and it would only make the feelings worse for me.
(Let me insert here that legal action is a no-go since Nebraska is an 'at-will' state and Karl could fire Popeye for having blue eyes if he wanted to.)
So on Sunday night, after conference, Popeye sat down with all of us. I have been feeling very over-whelmed with the fact that the money is starting to dwindle away and there isn't any hope of income in the near future. He sat down and recounted the story from the Book of Mormon of Nephi and his family crossing the sea on the ship that he built. He told the kids how Nephi's older brothers had tied Nephi up for 4 days and had threatened anyone who would help him. And because of their actions, they weren't able to get to the promised land right away. He said that our family is the same way. Unless we repent; start being nicer to each other, having scripture study & family home evening, helping happily, etc... then we're going to stay stuck here and we'll never get a job somewhere. 'Tis true, the Spirit confirmed this to me, as well.
After talking with them about all of that, he sat us each down and gave each of us a priesthood blessing. Some of them were sweeter than others, some of them were almost complete chastisement.
Mine was oh so sweet. But I'm having a hard time with it. In the blessing he told me of the truthfulness of the atonement. How the atonement wasn't only for the sins of the world, but the frustrations and anger as well. He counseled me to utilize the atonement so that these feelings can be gone.
I don't know how to do that, though. How do you forgive someone after they've hurt you as badly as they have? How do I keep these horrible thoughts from consuming me? How do I let Christ take over? If anyone has any experience with this, I'll be happy to listen to your counsel.
So we find ourselves looking around us and picking out what we are going to sell. Some of our treasures, some of the things that make us happy but won't get used for years to come - if at all, some of the bigger items that would make moving more bulky but would help to finance it if they sold. The couches will go. My beloved white leaning shelves. My scrapbooking supplies. Armoires. and the lovely knick-knacks that make me happy when I look at them. But I know we should try to get rid of as much as possible.
I don't know where we're going to go. There are only 25 school days left (maybe 23?) and then there will be nothing holding us here and we will move on somewhere. When I find out, I'll let you know.
So.
That's what's going on here. Today we're enjoying a blizzard (Snow Day) which means cleaning and baking. YUM! I do believe I smell some cookies baking right now - Popeye's really good at cookies. I think I'll go have one.
Carry on.

The thing about new years resolutions is I feel I'm setting myself up for failure. Last year I thought I had some pretty weighty - yet attainable - goals. Aw who am I kidding? I've NEVER kept a SINGLE new years goal I've set for myself.
My dad made us make goals when we were little and so from a young age I've proven to be a failure in the goal-keeping department.
That doesn't mean I don't try.
But this year will be different. Oh, don't you worry, I'm not setting myself up for failure this year. No Way! This year I'm not making any hefty goals. I'm making one. One goal that I KNOW I can keep.
....drumroll....

This year I am going to try harder.

That's it. I'll try a little harder at reading my scriptures. I'm going to try harder at fitting into my skinny clothes (which I'm getting there already - ahem, 6 pounds and 6.75 inches in 2 weeks). I'm going to try harder at being a great wife and mother.
I read a blog post (located on my piterest board under 'parenting made easy') recently from a woman who started to belittle herself while walking her son to the bus stop. It was the first time she had done it in ages and at first she gave herself a pat on the back but then the negative thoughts started flooding in. Thoughts such as, "Who are you kidding? One time in months? You're a horrible mother!" After the barrage of negativity she pushed the thoughts away and thought something like, "Yes, but you did it today. And THAT is a drop of awesomeness in your bucket." And then she picked up a marker that was on the floor instead of stepping over it for the umpteenth time - drop of awesomeness. She kept doing those little things (a piece of fruit with her daughter's lunch, running a load of laundry, wiping the counters, etc...) and kept adding to her little bucket of aweesomeness. Well, turns out there's more to this spiritually.
She teaches the young women at her church and asked them to use the medicine dropper to put in drops of awesomeness (water) into a bucket on the table and to get it to fill up. By the end of the lesson, the girls had been coming up with all kinds of awesome things they had done that week but didn't get anywhere close to the top of the bucket. That's where her pitcher of water came into play. She dumped it into the bucket, causing it to overflow (she had the bucket inside a large bowl) and explained that it was Christ filling the bucket for them. He picks up our slack. :) I LOVED that.
So. This year's resolution is to try harder to fill my bucket of awesomeness. And then I'll let Christ fill it the rest of the way up and we can be a team!

On that note, it's time for me to wake up the munchkins and get them ready for school.
Have a wonderful week!

Christmas in the Royal House

This year we got an elf assigned to our family from Santa. Her name is Trixie. The first day she came, the girls were quick to point out that she needed a skirt. So I went downstairs and whipped that little number up for her and set it on the window next to her.

 

 

We left for the afternoon and came home to find her attempting to make another skirt. She sure did make a mess of my sewing area. I knew from that moment on that we needed to learn patience a little more since she didn't clean up after herself.

(She had already moved on when I took this picture.)

 

 

She was a very mischievous elf.

She baked cookies.

 

 

She went on a date with Ken.

 

She undecorated our Christmas tree.

 

She decorated a smaller tree isntead.

She had a marshmallow roast over a candle.

 

Some other things she did was clean up the girls' room and hide in their stuffed animals, go for a joy ride on the tricycle, stacked the kitchen chairs, turned our milk green (the kids were convinced they would receive some of her magical powers if they drank the green milk).

It was a lot of fun for the kids and for Popeye and myself.

 

The next few pics are of the kids before their Christmas concert.

 

 

Their performances were fun to watch AND listen to.

 

We had a wonderful Christmas this year! Our family was sponsored by Toys for Tots again this year so what was going to be a rather meager Christmas turned out to be a fun morning. Popeye bought me a new beater for my kitchenAid - it has a built-in scraper on it (LOVE!). He also bought me my first gun - a .22 rifle. I can't wait to go shoot it. He took it to work that night and cleaned it for me.

I ended up getting Popeye a bike trainer and a new stereo for his jeep. He was really wanting a new puppy, but I couldn't bring myself to go down a puppy-training trail.

It was a fun, quiet Christmas spent performing random acts of kindness to strangers. we were trying to do as our Savior did and bring people closer to Him through our actions.

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and I pray that 2013 will bring us all some excitement and peace and happiness!

I have so many emotions surging through me right now.
We just got back from Omaha where we went to Popeye's grandmother's funeral. Popeye is her first-born grandchild and he wasn't asked to be a casket bearer. It has upset him so much and I don't know how to help him. The men that were asked to do that weren't even men that Grandma liked very much. Well, a couple of them were, but most weren't. It was very offensive.
And not only that - Popeye's uncle didn't even know that Grandma was in the hospital, let alone died, until the next morning! The sister's handled everything but left the brothers out completely. My mother-in-law tried to get them to include Popeye & his brother in the ceremonies but they didn't. I know there's nothing we can do about it now except try to muddle through these hurt feelings.
And now the sisters are in charge of taking care of the estate and Popeye wants only one thing. The flag from his grandfather's funeral. His grandfather served in the Navy, as did Popeye's father. Not one of the other children/grandchildren have served in the armed forces (I have to include that last part because they've served time - just not in the armed forces). I think it's only fair & fitting that the flag be passed down through the servicemen in the family. Don't you? And my father-in-law being the quiet man he is, probably won't get too involved in the estate divisions.
And this makes me sad. I foresee a lot of sentimental things going to the meth-head cousins rather than the ones who cared most, even though they may have lived far away.
The lack of respect from the cousins was astonishing to me. Showing up in jeans, tee-shirts, beanies & half sober. Quite the legacy she left behind. The only respectable ones were the ones that broke away from that small town. I'm not joking. It was sad. And it makes me sad for Popeye that he wants nothing to do with his extended family. If this sounds like a "holier than thou" post - it is. I've never tried touting my own horn about my "righteous" behavior. But man, seeing them makes me think that I'm doing a pretty good job getting through this life.
Another feeling: I'm glad we were able to go. Popeye was able to have a very special moment at the funeral that leaves me knowing his grandmother loved him very much. I'm so glad he had that moment. I'm trying to touch on that to help him through his hurt feelings.  I wonder if Grandma heard Grand Duchess ask me, "How is Great Grandma going to wake up?" Me: "What was that, Sweetie?" Her: "How will she know when to wake up? We should put an alarm clock in there with her." Me: "*chuckling* She doesn't need an alarm clock. Jesus will wake her up when it's time for her to wake up." It was such a sweet moment, I hope Great grandma heard it. And I think she did.
It was a weekend with a lot of mixed emotions. And it took all of the money that I had just made at my craft fair to go there. Which now leaves me feeling so distraught that Christmas will be bleak. I've tried picking up a few things here and there for the kids through the year, but with this job paying less than what we need to live, I haven't been very productive in that department. I wish I had a cleaning gig or two to bring in some money for gifts. I know it's not supposed to be about the presents, but it's hardly fair for the kids to go without on Christmas morning. Praying for a small miracle that I can make it work somehow.
My fingers are sore from all the orders I'm filling. I got 6 done on our trip & was able to pick up some much needed supplies at Hobby Lobby while I was there. Now that all of my yarn that I ordered has gotten here & all the little extra bobbles are purchased, I can bust these out like no one's business! After I do some laundry, clean the kitchen, sweep the living room, etc...
Oh, and my Dyson died AGAIN! This time it won't turn on. :( So off to Sears she went again to be sent to Denver to get fixed. I took her there last week and called them today to see when she got sent off. As my luck would have it, she is still sitting at Sears. Company is coming for Thanksgiving and I'll have dirty carpets. I hate Sears for this reason. I wish I had a back up vacuum - or that one of my friends had 2 that I could use one. :(
Man, this is certainly the gripe post, isn't it? I'm sorry for that. I'm feeling pretty low right now. And didn't feel Facebook would be appropriate to vent.
Okay - I'll finish with a happy thought.
I had a wonderful conversation with Popeye's cousins (normal cousins) who I thought were married but are really brother/sister. I opened my mouth and inserted both feet, but we laughed for a good 10 minutes. And after such a somber day and seeing a lot of tears, it was a wonderful way to finish a funeral. I told Popeye that when I die I want it to be a party. I also told him I wanted a huge tombstone so everyone knows where I'm buried. :) Because of the events of the week, it got me thinking about my life should Popeye not come home. I changed the plan for my life. Instead of going and living with my folks and going back to school, I think I'll just move to Cheyenne, get some land, bury Popeye there (obviously have his body moved) & go back to school there. when voicing this plan to his cousins they thought it strange (and worrisome) that I would have such an elaborate plan. But a plan I have and I feel good about it. :) (I hope I don't have to carry it out, though.)
so, have a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday. Be sure to eat lots of yummy turkey, give lots of thanks for the blessings you have & enjoy the time with your family.
I'm thankful for all of you. :)

So I'm going to give some of my political views. They'll be jumbled, I'm sure. I'm not here to debate with you. I'm here to voice my opinions on MY blog. If you want to comment you go right on ahead. But keep it nice or I'll delete you. :)

Let's get started.

First. I recently rented "Obama 2016" from the Redbox. I recommend EVERYONE see it. BEFORE NOVEMBER 6TH!!! Whether you love the man or hate him, you really need to see the film about his life. If you love him, I'm sure you will think that the movie is made up, biased, etc. If you dislike the man then you'll dread what our country is in store for if he's re-elected. Seriously, please go watch it. Then tell your friends to see it, too.

Second. I'm amazed that there are members of the church who support President Obama. I don't understand how a person can commit to living the Gospel of Jesus Christ and then think that Obama's policies and character are what they support. I seriously don't get it.

Third. I'm mad at my friends and family members who are voting for write-ins. I do not think they understand that this election is probably THE most important election to date & to come. By voting for Rosanne Barr as your write-in, you are sealing your fate. She is not going to win. Don't write her in. I know it may sound dictatorish of me, but really you need to vote for Mitt or Obama. Those are the 2 it comes down to.

Fourth. I JUST found out how the electoral vote works. As in, 30 minutes ago. Do you need a brief synopsis? Here's how it works. Each state has congressional districts depending on the state's population. CA has 35 million people, they have 53(?) districts whereas KS has 3 million people so they only have 4 districts. Each district is allowed 1 electoral vote. Each state also gets an additional 2 votes because they have 2 senators. So CA get 55 electoral votes while KS gets 6. The people vote, the votes are counted and whoever gets the majority vote gets all the electoral votes.  There are 539 total electoral votes nation-wide. So a candidate needs 270 to win. That's why they focus so much on CA, OH, FL, etc... because they have the most electoral votes.

Fifth. Sometimes I honestly feel that most democrats just vote for Obama because they are democrats. And I feel Republicans vote for Romney because he's republican. I wonder if more people researched if they would change their minds or if they would think they're abandoning "their party". I know of only one extremely liberal person (whom I love so very much) who has changed her mind and is not voting for Obama this time around.

Sixth. I am infuriated, irritated & saddend by the political ads on tv. I get Denver's channels and since CO is a swing state, I get to see all the hate on my tv. It sickens me to watch Obama lie about what he's accomplished (and sometimes they're not flat out lies, but lies of omission) and/or trash talk Romney while Romney's ads are somewhat similar, but less hate-filled. Most of Romney's ads are telling it like it is (Obama's record) or what he will do in office. I'm just tired of watching all of them.

Seventh. I watched a youtube video this morning put out by Romney. It shows Obama  giving a speech on 11-2-12 and he says we should vote for revenge. Romney then says we should vote for love of country. When I heard Obama say that the only thing that came to my mind was that he is being controlled by the adversary. God does not want or condone revenge. It is not God's way. The Spirit spoke to my soul and could not stress that point enough.

Eighth. I'm doing my research. I do not agree with some of Romney's views. I went to a website that had me answer a bunch of questions about my beliefs (not spiritual) and then calculated who I agree most with on different views. The website was isidewith.com or iside.com. Something like that. I side with Mitt 85%. I look at Mitt's track record on his successes. I'm amazed that people can trash him saying he's been rich his whole life and they've never had to work for what they have. Ummm, clearly they don't know.
Mitt was a republican governor in MA that was able to bring both parties together to help that state get on it's feet. He turned what should have been a failed winter olympics into a success and actually MADE money on it. He is a decent human being. He gives of his time and his resources willingly to people he doesn't even know. He is a brilliant business man. BRILLIANT!

Ninth. Each time I see Mitt on the tv or my facebook page, I am reaffirmed that he is the man I need to vote for. And then I read comments or hear Obama ads and am terrified that he won't win. I am TERRIFIED of what will happen should Obama be re-elected. TERRIFIED. (Have I said that enough?) I've been scared of things before, but never to this magnitude. If Obama wins and his agenda is carried out then I am in deep trouble.
We don't have health insurance and we will be forced into Obamacare if I don't get some on my own. We will be living in a socialistic society. We will have no nuclear weapons to defend ourselves. We will have a debt over our heads that far outweighs any we've ever known. Did you know that Obama has 5 men that he deems as his mentors? Oh, no, they're not the founding fathers of this nation. They are men who were on the FBI's most wanted list, known communists, anti-colonialists, etc... Those type of men TAKE FREEDOM AWAY and he esteems them as great men.
TERRIFIED!!!

I think I should be done now. Please, go see "Obama 2016". Please vote for Mitt on Tuesday (which happens to be Popeye's birthday and that would be the best birthday present for him - a new president). Seriously, I'm telling you to vote for Mitt because it really is between those two and I can't fathom another 4 years with Obama.

That's it. I need to clean my kitchen now.

We spent the last few days out in Omaha with Popeye's dad and stepmom. The kids had a great time. We got to actually saddle up the horses (a first!) and ride both Saturday and Sunday. Princess Monkey Eyes was in heaven. "Sugar" doesn't get saddled very often and they're trying to train her. I got to ride her and work with her on her rein training. Funny thing - I've learned that while riding a horse with a bit in its mouth, if you want to turn right then you apply pressure with your left leg and pull your reins to the right. Well, their horses only know about the reins, not the legs. So each time I applied pressure with my leg, she would break out into a trot. I learned quickly not to use my legs with the horses while I had a kid in the saddle with me. :)
This morning Mr. Fantastic had an audiology appointment. We thought that since we were there visiting family, he should get reprogrammed. Advanced Bionics (the maker of his CI) has come out with a new program. It's called Clear Voice. What it does is if Mr. F. is in a room with background noise that's kinda constant/steady (think of a fan, restaurant, etc...) then the program will find the frequency that the whitenoise is on and then minimize it. How cool is that?! Mr. Fantastic went into the soundproof room to try it out. His audiologist turned on the whitenoise and then a man's voice came across the speakers saying different sentences. First Mr. Fantastic said, "Whoa." (Meaning it was really loud in there.) But then 3 seconds later (after the program had identified the whitenoise) he said, "Cool." Yeah, totally.
Then we started the long ride home. It was REALLY long. Optimus Prime had been barfing all morning - and it didn't stop. We pulled over 3 more times to let him barf along I-80. Not to mention all of the bathroom breaks along the way, too. Why can't my kids be more like me and just hold it until they get home?! Sheesh! The last stretch home I had put in a CD that one of my dear friends gave me. Her sister had arranged new melodies and music for 8 different hymns. They're gorgeous and I love listening to them. The kids love it, too. Grand Duchess was singing along to the songs (trying) and when one of the songs ended she said, "You know why she said 'Be Still'? Because she was painting nails." And another comment she made was, "She's asking for help because she was going to fall off a cliff." Oh, okay. She's so funny.
Let's see. What else has been going on here?
Just plugging away with life. Popeye has started hunting again with another deputy out this way. Hopefully he'll bring us home some meat one of these days.
Mr. Fantastic turns 12 in 2 weeks. I can't believe it. And Princess Monkey Eyes turned 8 last week! My dad came up for her baptism. It was an incredibly spiritual day - much needed in the Royal House. Princess Monkey Eyes has been a changed person ever since. Her fit throwing is kept to a minimum and she is now trying to be a peacemaker. It's awesome.
I think that's about it for now.
It was a long drive home, so I'm going to go crawl into bed.
Tomorrow I'm going running with Popeye - the navy ball is this weekend & I have to try my hardest to lose these pounds. They won't seem to go away no matter how hard I try! Desperate measures are to be taken, I fear.
Anyway. I'm tired. Carry on with your lives and thanks for stopping in to read my update!

Popeye's been going through some pretty nasty stuff at work. When I say nasty - I don't mean having to do with the local fires and long shifts, either. I mean, people have been spreading vicious rumors about him to his boss. And the worst part is - his boss believes them.
And not just that his boss believes them, but he viciously, verbally attacked Popeye about said rumors.
That doesn't speak well for the man at all.

But you know what my awesome husband did?
He took it. He defended himself calmly and left it at that. He wrote a letter to the boss but never sent it. (Even I wrote a letter - but I didn't send it either.)

It's been a couple of weeks since this all went down. The boss has been avoiding Popeye like the Plague.
But because of all the fires in our area right now, the boss has had to deal with my husband.

So today Popeye decided something. He was going to email his boss.
But not in the sense that I was anticipating. He was telling his boss thank you for spending all the long hours helping with the fires and making sure there was coverage. He figured that the man deserved a little bit of praise, because he probably wasn't going to get it from anyone else. Heaven knows he doesn't deserve it most of the time, but maybe he's acting out for attention - I don't know.

Maybe Popeye's boss will treat him with a little more respect now. Maybe not. But regardless, Popeye did the right thing and I couldn't be more proud. I'm proud of him for being proactive, for trying to set a Christ-like example, for not just letting the man walk all over him. My husband is in no-way a butt kisser - but this little act of praise just might be the ticket to help smooth things over until we can get out of here.
Now, if only the mother of that teenage boy who Popeye helped last week would call the boss and sing Popeye's praises to him to help restore his image - that would really help.

Yeah, that's about it. I'll post pics and such of the fire and aftermath on another post. It was crazy scary for a few days there.
Carry on.