Mother's Day 2008

I wasn't going to write about my mother's day - but I changed my mind. Sue me.

My mother's day was fine.

For those who know me really well, you know the feelings I am struggling with in regards to motherhood.

Church was nice. White carnation and a chocolate bar. The flower got pinned to Princess Monkey Eyes while the chocolate was consumed by yours truly before gospel doctrine. The bishop's wife gave a great talk - until the end when she said, "I love being a mother." I tuned out after that.

As I sat in the foyer with Thor, a friend came up to me (knowing my feelings) and said, "Just what you need, huh? A day to rub it in your face... yadda yadda yadda."

It is PRECISELY how I was feeling.

And then I came home & took a nap. Popeye had to work & he usually takes naps with me, but he stayed awake taking care of the kids, I guess. I don't know - I was sleeping. But it was sweet of him. And then it was time to wake up and make dinner. Yes, I made my own dinner. Popeye's good at 2 things. French toast & waffles. We were out of bread and I'm not very fond of waffles. So I made puffy tacos. And they were delish!

After we were done eating, Popeye whipped out his present. Let me back up here. I had spent a good portion of the night transferring video from his camera to my laptop and onto a CD and I promised not to look at it. And I didn't. But I stayed up until almost 1:00 am working on - MY OWN MOTHER'S DAY PRESENT!!! So I wasn't really looking forward to the disc - especially since I could've just left it on my hard drive and gotten an extra hour of sleep. But Popeye whipped out a folder. And on the front was a picture of Mary holding the baby Jesus.

And the first 3 pages were a letter written to me from Popeye. And while this will be a little long - I would like to write some of what he wrote. It left me in tears.

MOTHER, n.: female parent

That was the Webster's definition of mother. Being a mother is more than a "female parent". The First Presidency stated "motherhood" is near to divinity. It is the highest, holiest service to be assumed by makind. It places her who honor its holy calling and service next to angels. (Yeah, I was already crying by this point.)

There is no doubt there is not a more noble and exhausting job than that of a mother. But it takes more than just having a child to be called mother. It takes patience, love, commitment, sacrifice, hard work, and a Christ-like attitude. One cannot be called a mother if she lacks any of these values... (boy do I feel guilty.)

...(he talks about Mary & Jesus and the 200 Stripling Warriors)...

...I went into a little scripture accounts of being a mother. I know there are times when being a mother is hard work. You spend all day with the kids. You listen to them fight, cry, whine & argue. I know being a mother is trying. I don't need to list the ways, but I can say your efforts do not go unnoticed. At least not in the eyes of our Savior. I know your hard work does not go unnoticed by the children. Sure there are times (more often than not) that they seem like they don't respect you or honor your hard work. But you can see it in their eyes when you play with them and take time out to listen to them.

I have also enclosed a picture you had taken of all the kids together. All of them have a smile and love in their eyes. It is not a pose or a fake smile. They do love you. They may not mind or obey all the time, but they do love you very much...
(This is the picture)



...I can sit here all day stating how there is no greater calling than that of a mother. Now I want to let you know how much I appreciate what you do for the children. You have taught them how to pray. Your example has helped them to want to pray always before a meal no matter where we are. It is your example and teachings that inspire Mr. Fantastic to want to share the gospel and give out Books of Mormon to his friends. It is you that is always taking them to church when I am not able to make it. It is you who takes the children to school and get them registered. It is you that signs them up for sports. It is you who buys them treats at the store and buy them toys. It is you who goes all out in throwing birthday parties. It was you who watched Mr. Fantastic get sick and almost die in your arms. Most of all, it was you who allowed their spirits to come to this earth to be taught and tried.

It will be you who will help with Princess ME's wedding. It will be you who helps the boys get ready for their missions. It will be you who will teach Princess ME how to put on make-up (correctly). It will be you who stays up all night worrying when the children come home later than they should have. It will be you who shapes the majority of their lives.

I know I've said a lot. I know I probably repeated myself. Know that your efforts don't go unnoticed. The kids love you very much. I love you very much. And most importantly, Heavenly Father loves you very much...

...When things are trying regarding the kids, one thing you can think about is how excited they were in the spirit world to come to this earth even before WE got here. How excited they must have been to know they would be coming to a home that will teach them the gospel and to know they would be loved. They chose us as much as we chose and volunteered to come here to prepare a way for them.

I know there are good times and bad times, but don't give up. We all love you and sometimes you may not know it, but we appreciate your hard work and sacrifice for this family. I hope you have a happy mother's day. You are wonderful.
***
I needed this. I bawled. And then I watched 'PS, I love you' after the kids went to sleep (because that was my surprise present from him that I've been wanting). And I bawled some more. And I still struggle with motherhood. I still struggle with the feelings coursing through me. But he knew. Popeye knew that I needed to know that I am not unnoticed. He knew that I needed some validation. And he tried to give it to me & I love him for that.

So, to all you mothers out there who are reading this. YOU do not go unnoticed. And I hope you had a decent mother's day. Some have better mother's days than others. This year, I feel it's overrated. But maybe my feelings will change by next year. Hopefully.

I'm sorry this was so long. Thanks for putting up with me...

Happy Mother's Day everyone!