Hormones & Soul Searching

Let me tell you, this pregnancy is like no other I've had. No morning sickness. No weird food cravings. No pelvic pain. It's been wonderful!!! But something started with me yesterday that I haven't had with any of my other children.

I cry. A lot. Here's a little list for you of the things I cried about in the last 24 hours. And only the last 24 hours, mind you. And it only started yesterday. What will the next 4 and a half months bring?

• Popeye told me he's been thinking of going to Kuwait. That's not what got me crying. What got me crying was the fact that I don't want anyone else in the delivery room with me except him. So who would I get? THAT is what got me crying. And I'm sure that he thought it was a HUGE deal because the only time I DO cry is when it's a huge deal. And even then, not so much. So he is probably freaking out.
• I called Mr. Fantastic's primary teacher and asked her some questions about his behavior & listening skills during class. She's not so concerned because it's that age of boys & they vie for attention - mainly class clown issues - but it's not acceptable to me. However, Mr. Fantastic does TRY to sing the songs in primary, even though he doesn't understand the words to the song - whereas the other mischievous boys just don't want to sing. So talking with her brought me to tears, too.
• I called a friend. Talking with her made me cry. And I really enjoy her.
• I listened to the song, "If the Savior Stood Beside Me" in the van. Yes, bring on the water works. I love that song. For those of you who don't know it, it goes a little something like this: 'If the Savior stood beside me would I do the things I do? Would I follow his example and try harder to be true?... (it goes on to talk about our actions... and the second verse talks about our words) Would I say the things I say? Would my words be warm and kind if He were never far away? ... (and the third verse talks about how He IS beside us...)'. So, needless to say, I cried. Twice.

So is it hormones or do I need to do some serious soul searching here? Is Popeye going to go to Kuwait and leave me here with 5 munchkins all alone for a year? Or am I over-thinking this and really have nothing to worry about? Do the thoughts of Mr. Fantastic not being ready for baptism make me cry because I think I've failed in some way and Heavenly Father is trying to tell me to get on the ball and teach him more? Or am I just hormonal? Does the song make me teary because I really SHOULD be trying to be better & do better & say better or has this pregnancy finally caused my hormones to go askew?

Even if it IS just hormones, working on these things would make me a better mom & person. I just wish I wasn't keeping the tissue company in business!

*Sniff* - I have to go blow my nose. Excuse me.